2012 resolutions

hello world, we meet again. so i've been thinking, since i don't even realize i have resolutions right after i make resolutions which in return make me not keep my resolutions, why do i keep making them then? and the answer that i came up with was that no matter what people keep saying, about how you don't need resolutions and all to go on with your life, i find it comforting that i actually have something to stick to, although as i've said in my sentence above i don't even remember having them. and here's my list:

•study my ass off regardless when exam time is - which translates to everyday, if possible

•maintain my sanity although ryan's my class teacher, and although there are possibilities of being taunted over and over again

•do the best i can in STPM; i don't wanna disappoint anyone again. preferably with a 4 pointer but i know that's kinda impossible

•keep my cool at all times

•be more religious

•spend less time going online (this is gonna be real hard)

•have a more positive outlook of things, like be happy and move on with life

well, i guess that's just about it, we will have to wait for exactly a year from now on to see how i fare. given that we are all still alive by then.

new year's resolution 2011

okay folks, let's see how i did in keeping up with my resolutions. this has somehow become a tradition for me, well, look at my previous posts. here we go.

○ never regret my decision to go to USA

there was absolutely no regrets, but things could have been better. like, i would have enjoyed being hosted in la or some big city like new york but oh well, if i did, i probably would not have met all the amazing people i met in georgia. but at the same time, i do feel a tinge of regret for getting myself involved in a relationship which resulted in me being dumped. well i'm not gonna lie; it was amazing while it lasted, and i'd rather regret the things that i have done rather than things i did not do.

○ accept my SPM results with an open heart

when i found out my spm results from my mom after staying up all night waiting for the phone call, i was devastated cos i got a for my bible knowledge. oh well, i guess i probably don't have a brain built for a theologian. and it was also the day when lauren found out her nonna died, so yeah it wasn't fun. and after enrolling myself in form six only i realize how insignificant the form 5 cert is.

○ i should stop getting so pissed off over small matters

well, i did not stick to this one, because i got pissed off over small matters really easily especially when someone was there to care about me. i don't even know what was wrong with me but hopefully, i get to keep this resolution next year given that i don't forget about it.

○ be more responsible

oh yes, you bet i was. i did my own laundry, i was a fine role model for my two younger host sisters, most importantly i adhered to the three golden rule of afs - no drinking, no driving and no hitchhiking. plus, i was the best exchange student for apalachee high school! that's gotta be something to brag about!

○ stop procrastinating

hmm.. i think i fared pretty well the first half of the year but then it got progressively worse until i was back in square one toward the end of the year. which means i need to buck up!

Kristyl, this one's for you !

i know you're probably gonna be reading this so i dedicate this blogpost specially for you! (okay, this is the moment when you go "aww i love you forever and ever your my bestest friend till death do us part" blah blah) hahaa!

today was a pretty good day, the highlight of the night was most definitely when we were all spooked out by the tree where there was an apparent sighting of the supernatural. shizz, typing this makes me shudder...

*shivers*

anyway, i'm sorry for wasting two mins outta your life reading this :]

i lied, i actually am not sorry! muahahaa.

Host family

it's about time i update my blog again. the last time i did was like what, 3 months ago? that's like half of my stay in america hahaa! and speaking of america, i've only skyped with my host family once since i got back. i'm not an ungrateful child, but most of the time carolann [american host sister] is not online, although most of the time my host mom is online. heck, she's online 24/7, but i don't wanna talk to her. i don't know why, but i do not feel like talking to her at all. plus, she's having a new child from indonesia, so i don't think she give two hoots about me anymore. and speaking about giving two hoots, she kicked lauren out right after they celebrated their "sweet 16" (although a more appropriate title would be "i'm almost 60 but i'm shameless and my aussie daughter is 16 so i'll just be 16 again). and based on her action that i frown upon, i'm just gonna conclude that she hosts exchange student just for the sake of pride. during the whole time when lauren and i were there, we were starved in her house. we were almost always hungry, because their whole family don't eat much, which is such a huge shocker because i swear all of them are fricking obese. we came home from school hungry, and we go to bed hungry. this is why the both of us always crash our friends' houses, and she gets pissed when we do that. i mean, come on!! why must you make life hard for us??? in addition, lauren lost so much of weight, it's not even funny. but it's good for her though, she was kinda chubby in the beginning of the year but now she's stunning.

I'll just stop my ranting here, because she might be spying on my blog and i don't want it to happen.

it's gonna be winter soon, and i can't believe i'm missing out on it! i absolutely love winter!

depressed, miserable. no one understands.

i attended school yesterday and i did not like it. there was no one that i know of and i felt like a fish out of water. i hate that feeling. although i did make some new friends, but it just cant beat the feeling of having actual close friends that you can talk about anything to.

i felt lonely and stressed. stressed because i really cannot catch up with my studies.

i am two months behind and am clueless as hell.

and the break up is really eating me up from the inside. i cant tell anyone. well, i did tell some of my friends on facebook but i don't get to tell them face-to-face. talking to lauren definitely lifted my spirits up a little, but its just not the same, you know?

i seriously am going crazy.

goodbye, kuantan

i'm currently listening to 'enchanted' by taylor swift and towards the end, the lyrics goes like this : 

please dont be in love with someone else, please don't have somebody waiting on you...

how much things will change after 6 months? will i be a completely different person when i come back, will i do things i never thot i would, like making a snow angel or going for prom ?

today will be my last day at home in front of my computer desk writing this before i resume the same activity six months later. although i have been wanting this to happen since i was 13, somehow i still am not ready for this life-changing experience. the thot of leaving the nest i've been so comfortably settled in is alien to me. but it's gotta happen someday, raiite ?

i hope you're still the same person after six months. i hope nothing changes our relationship, no matter how far we are from each other. but if the opposite happens, well..

i was enchanted to meet you.

:}

2011 resolutions

the reason why i keep making resolutions even though i might not follow it is because i wanna keep track on my life. i'm forgetful, clumsy and live life in the moment. so hopefully this resolution will keep me from straying away from what i am supposed to do. 

○ never regret my decision to go to USA

○ accept my SPM results with an open heart

○ i should stop getting so pissed off over small matters

○ be more responsible

○ stop procrastinating

i think i wont be able to keep my last resolution this year. oh well, there's always next year.

new year's resolution 2010

well,.. what i have here is a list of resolutions i made last year and let's see how i fare.

○ try to actually DO homework instead of copying them.

   okay, maybe i did do a little homework here and there.. so.. resolution failed.

○ win this year's SIR

   yes, i did it !

○ study really really REALLY hard for SPM

   nope, this did not work out too well.. although i did study really hard the night before. it counts, right ?

○ go for AFS interview

   PASSED ! i'm on my way there, america !

○ enjoy life

   yes, there was definitely a lot of enjoyment in my life especially when all the other kids are studying their asses off. the guilt is hitting me now.

○ get driver's licence

   nope, mom's still not buying the excuse of me sending my brother and sister to school. apparently she doesn't want them to be killed by me.

○ STOP procrastination!

   i'll stop procrastinating tomorrow.

so, there goes my resolution for 2010. what's your verdict ?