Sunday, February 23, 2014
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Please Donate To My Hearing Aid Fund
So this is my first week of lectures right, and for my statistics class I got this most Chinese-looking lady in the mid-fifties as my lecturer. Once she started talking, my ears started bleeding. She puts on this very obviously fake British (Australian?) accent but it comes with a tinge of Malaysian ? Ugh I don't even know fuck that accent it makes me so fucking OCD because her grammar is terrible yet she tries so hard to fake an accent she so obviously lost a long long time ago.
How am I so sure she faked the accent ? Firstly, she tries too hard emphasize her T's and her A's (the best example would be how an English says "water"). Secondly, she speaks slowly. I can vouch that this is the main reason she's faking it because if I wanna fake my American accent I'd do the same thing. Speaking slowly gives me more time to think back about how I should pronounce words a certain way that would sound American. And it's a very conscious act. Thirdly, she drops her accent while speaking to students personally. She loses the accent when a Malaysian kid approaches her to speak to her privately. Although I haven't actually personally spoken to her, I have eavesdropped a conversation of said person and another mate.
Ugh fuck her fake ass accent. I can absolutely not focus in class because I focus too much on her fucking accent and her fucking sucky ass grammar. She may be able to fool other dumb kids in class but not me. Should I just email her to just drop her accent? AHH THINKING ABOUT HER ACCENT DRIVES ME INSANE I CAN FEEL MY EARWAX BUILDING UP TREMENDOUSLY TO BLOCK OUT HER VOICE. WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT?! DOES SHE ACTUALLY DERIVE PLEASURE FROM TORTURING MY POOR EARDRUMS ???
And the way she says "NO". Oh lord please have some mercy on me. If you've ever heard an Australian say "NO", that's exactly what it sounds like. Except for you have to picture an old lady with sagging double chin say it.
I have to endure this for 14 weeks. 4 hours each week. I hope I make it out alive.
How am I so sure she faked the accent ? Firstly, she tries too hard emphasize her T's and her A's (the best example would be how an English says "water"). Secondly, she speaks slowly. I can vouch that this is the main reason she's faking it because if I wanna fake my American accent I'd do the same thing. Speaking slowly gives me more time to think back about how I should pronounce words a certain way that would sound American. And it's a very conscious act. Thirdly, she drops her accent while speaking to students personally. She loses the accent when a Malaysian kid approaches her to speak to her privately. Although I haven't actually personally spoken to her, I have eavesdropped a conversation of said person and another mate.
Ugh fuck her fake ass accent. I can absolutely not focus in class because I focus too much on her fucking accent and her fucking sucky ass grammar. She may be able to fool other dumb kids in class but not me. Should I just email her to just drop her accent? AHH THINKING ABOUT HER ACCENT DRIVES ME INSANE I CAN FEEL MY EARWAX BUILDING UP TREMENDOUSLY TO BLOCK OUT HER VOICE. WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT?! DOES SHE ACTUALLY DERIVE PLEASURE FROM TORTURING MY POOR EARDRUMS ???
And the way she says "NO". Oh lord please have some mercy on me. If you've ever heard an Australian say "NO", that's exactly what it sounds like. Except for you have to picture an old lady with sagging double chin say it.
I have to endure this for 14 weeks. 4 hours each week. I hope I make it out alive.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)