So I live with 4 male housemates and 3 other female housemates. I get along well with everyone except two of the dick owners out of the four. This is because they own only one thing - a dick. Not even a brain. Not even a PEA-SIZED brain. If I could crack open their skulls, it would be empty. My anger is completely justified, though.
One of this dude, let's call him Chew because that's actually his real name, is a fucking brainless misogynistic pig. His ideal woman is a subservient slave that does nothing but cook, clean, and give sex. However, what's funny is that his girlfriend is an irony. His girlfriend controls his every movement so he can't get tagged with us housemates on FB or she will lose her shit and personally fly here to kick him in his balls.
This second idiot, let's call him Vincent cause that's what he calls himself, is also of the same species as Chew. I swear these two pigs were put on earth in the form of humans to test my patience. Anyway, this Vincent is a grade A asshole. He's not an asshole to me, but to another girl that can't keep her mouth shut. So in a way it's kinda justified but his assholery trumps over her blabbery and again let me reiterate myself he's a fucking idiot so he is still at fault here.
The other day during dinner we came to the subject of girlfriends/boyfriends. So someone said something along the lines of "paying for meals with your bf/gf" and without missing a beat Vincent jumped on the topic full-force and stated "I will never pay for my girlfriend's food using my parents' hard earned money!!!"
Okay calm your tits.
Firstly, you are clearly not fit to get into a relationship. How is it that you have had 3 girlfriends in the past is beyond me. Why would any girl even find you remotely attractive at half the shit you say? And not to mention your selfishness. I can pay for both our meals because I work and save.
Secondly, you're a fucking idiot.
And so this Chew asked me to say something nice about potty mouth girl to Vincent to change his mind that she is actually suitable for him (um wtf?) and the first thing that popped out of his mouth is telling me to say that potty mouth is a good cook. This really pisses me off because this fucking idiot obviously see women as nothing more than a stay at home cooking machine. I will never forget that one time he told me I should cook dinner for everyone just because I'm a woman and I should be doing the cooking.
Justice porn - I obviously gave a huge piece of my mind to this fucktard Chew (I literally chew-ed him out) and as usual, his only comeback is "chill la joking only". Motherfucker, degrading women is not something you joke at!!!! Crawl back into your mother's womb and STAY THERE!
FUCK I swear people here sre so fucking stupid and ignorant sometimes.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
Glossophobia
Dear kids,
Today you will learn a new term. A term that relates to almost 75% of Americans. And we're not talking about the common Americans. We're talking about Americans who would choose death over speaking in public. In ancient Greece,
glosso = tongue
phobia = fear
therefore it literally translates to "fear of the tongue". Also more commonly known as "fear of public speaking". And today I was part of the 75%. A little background: I am taking Public Speaking this semester and it was not by choice but by force because every single person from my course needs to take it to graduate. So, we are taught by this pro-government lecturer who apparently has appeared LIVE on TV over a million times (his words not mine) (ok maybe not a million but close enough) who has no fear and is part of the 25%. So, the first few classes went good because its predictable and whatnot. However, the first thing he said when he walked into class this morning was about how he would pick 5 students at random to assess and this accounts for 10 marks. Ok, I thought to myself, 5 people out of 104 isn't so bad. I cant be that lucky. Heh. That's like a 4.8% chance to get picked. Such slim chance. Nah it won't be me.
The first person who got called was a girl and she got up, liked it or not she was going first or risk losing her 10 marks. She was definitely caught unprepared and was very very very nervous and she didn't know what to say so she apologised and went off.
The second person was another girl who seemed to have accepted her fate so she fared fairly better. At least she had a momentum and could still crap off on top of her head what she remembered about the lecture earlier (we were supposed to talk about what we've learnt).
And then he called out number "one one". It's eleven. The 11th number on the name list is........ MY fucking name. Well now I know where I rank alphabetically.
Holy fuck. I was caught unprepared because what the fuck I wasn't expecting that. I had no time to memorise anything and if you know me I have literally no memory so like it or not I walked up to the front. All the while my thought process was "fuck this fuck that fuckity fuck why me god". I was knee deep in my lecturer's shit. And so with trembling hands I grabbed the microphone and started talking.
Okay let me begin my speech today by telling you a story. When I was 8 years old, I had to go on stage to present a little essay my English teacher wrote me. I had the weekend to memorize it before I had to go up on stage during the assembly on Monday. But when it was my turn, I froze. I couldn't remember much because I was so nervous and the only thing I remembered about the essay was how a man was selling ice-cream by the street. I was so scared so I just mumbled something and then I was silent for a long time until my teacher told me to get off the stage. I was very embarrassed. And that is the story of how I had stage fright for the first time.
Or something along the line. I couldn't remember. My story was relevant to my speech. However, throughout my whole speech, I was still very visibly nervous. I did not manage to apply a single effective public speaking technique he's been telling me the past week. Towards the end I bullshitted something along the line of "fake it until you make it" and that's really ironic because no matter how much I was faking it, I still didn't make it.
And do you wanna know something even more ironic?
All of us did the same speech of "How To Overcome Stage Fright".
Bet you didn't expect that plot twist, did you?
Well right after my speech something unexpected happened. He said I had a very strong starting, and that the way I started my story was well done, and it was a good example. I was shocked. WHY DID I GET PRAISED??? I didn't know that the torment my primary English teacher put me through at 8 was finally worth it. Heck I didn't even know that my most embarrassing two hours on stage when I was a mini me would pay off. So, thank you, mean bitch, for thoroughly embarrassing me when I was so young. You knew I couldn't do it, that's why you picked on me. And that's not the worst part. The worst part was that even my sister laughed at me when we got home and told everyone. But you don't need to know that.
Overall it was a good but horrifying experience. I can finally check off "impromptu public speaking" off my bucket list (not that it was even on my list anyway), and I belong in the 25% now. Today I truly found out I have the talent of bullshitting on-the-spot. I'd better spend more time honing this new found skill, in case it would come in handy someday.
Today you will learn a new term. A term that relates to almost 75% of Americans. And we're not talking about the common Americans. We're talking about Americans who would choose death over speaking in public. In ancient Greece,
glosso = tongue
phobia = fear
therefore it literally translates to "fear of the tongue". Also more commonly known as "fear of public speaking". And today I was part of the 75%. A little background: I am taking Public Speaking this semester and it was not by choice but by force because every single person from my course needs to take it to graduate. So, we are taught by this pro-government lecturer who apparently has appeared LIVE on TV over a million times (his words not mine) (ok maybe not a million but close enough) who has no fear and is part of the 25%. So, the first few classes went good because its predictable and whatnot. However, the first thing he said when he walked into class this morning was about how he would pick 5 students at random to assess and this accounts for 10 marks. Ok, I thought to myself, 5 people out of 104 isn't so bad. I cant be that lucky. Heh. That's like a 4.8% chance to get picked. Such slim chance. Nah it won't be me.
The first person who got called was a girl and she got up, liked it or not she was going first or risk losing her 10 marks. She was definitely caught unprepared and was very very very nervous and she didn't know what to say so she apologised and went off.
The second person was another girl who seemed to have accepted her fate so she fared fairly better. At least she had a momentum and could still crap off on top of her head what she remembered about the lecture earlier (we were supposed to talk about what we've learnt).
And then he called out number "one one". It's eleven. The 11th number on the name list is........ MY fucking name. Well now I know where I rank alphabetically.
Holy fuck. I was caught unprepared because what the fuck I wasn't expecting that. I had no time to memorise anything and if you know me I have literally no memory so like it or not I walked up to the front. All the while my thought process was "fuck this fuck that fuckity fuck why me god". I was knee deep in my lecturer's shit. And so with trembling hands I grabbed the microphone and started talking.
Okay let me begin my speech today by telling you a story. When I was 8 years old, I had to go on stage to present a little essay my English teacher wrote me. I had the weekend to memorize it before I had to go up on stage during the assembly on Monday. But when it was my turn, I froze. I couldn't remember much because I was so nervous and the only thing I remembered about the essay was how a man was selling ice-cream by the street. I was so scared so I just mumbled something and then I was silent for a long time until my teacher told me to get off the stage. I was very embarrassed. And that is the story of how I had stage fright for the first time.
Or something along the line. I couldn't remember. My story was relevant to my speech. However, throughout my whole speech, I was still very visibly nervous. I did not manage to apply a single effective public speaking technique he's been telling me the past week. Towards the end I bullshitted something along the line of "fake it until you make it" and that's really ironic because no matter how much I was faking it, I still didn't make it.
And do you wanna know something even more ironic?
All of us did the same speech of "How To Overcome Stage Fright".
Bet you didn't expect that plot twist, did you?
Well right after my speech something unexpected happened. He said I had a very strong starting, and that the way I started my story was well done, and it was a good example. I was shocked. WHY DID I GET PRAISED??? I didn't know that the torment my primary English teacher put me through at 8 was finally worth it. Heck I didn't even know that my most embarrassing two hours on stage when I was a mini me would pay off. So, thank you, mean bitch, for thoroughly embarrassing me when I was so young. You knew I couldn't do it, that's why you picked on me. And that's not the worst part. The worst part was that even my sister laughed at me when we got home and told everyone. But you don't need to know that.
Overall it was a good but horrifying experience. I can finally check off "impromptu public speaking" off my bucket list (not that it was even on my list anyway), and I belong in the 25% now. Today I truly found out I have the talent of bullshitting on-the-spot. I'd better spend more time honing this new found skill, in case it would come in handy someday.
Friday, March 13, 2015
Immature Old Bitch
I just realised that this uni education system has me chasing after good grades. I am not such a person. Well not since I was 9 when my studies took a huge dip and I transferred from the first class to the second class and subsequently struggled to pick up the grades I once had. Anyway, since uni is relatively easy for me, I find it difficult not to get obsessed with scoring perfect GPA. And this has, in turn, transformed me into an ass kisser. If you know me you will know that there is no way in hell I would kiss anyone's ass.
Okay story time. The communications studies department in my uni is renowned for insane lecturers. Even the usage of the word "insane" is an understatement because if you are actually subjected under any of them's teaching you would know that there's more to them than just projected mental illness. However, this particular religion fanatic lecturer takes the cake. There are rumors (well more like truths) going around the faculty that she uses tears as threat. She will literally cry if you do not obey her instructions. What the fuck woman? Are you even a fucking LECTURER because that shit is unprofessional as fuck. Anddd since she is a communications lecturer I have to put up with her for FOUR consecutive semesters. Thats TWO whole years right there out of my THREE years. FUCK. But what she did that really got to me was how we are all required to buy her RM95 book. But there's a catch. Because she's fucking insane, remember? No good ever comes from a crazy bitch.The first catch is that she only ordered 80 books for the 120 students in our class. The second catch - EVERYONE is required to have the book. Third catch - OR ELSE all you bookless people sit in a corner while she teaches those with books. Fourth catch - NO PHOTOCOPIES.
Well, she is on a whole new level of crazy. FUCKING CATSHIT CRAZY BITCH OF A WOMAN. And this is just one little part of her personality you're seeing, its not even the full picture yet. This is why I kiss her ass whenever possible. Because you absolutely cannot reason with crazy people.
May the good lord have mercy on my soul.
Okay story time. The communications studies department in my uni is renowned for insane lecturers. Even the usage of the word "insane" is an understatement because if you are actually subjected under any of them's teaching you would know that there's more to them than just projected mental illness. However, this particular religion fanatic lecturer takes the cake. There are rumors (well more like truths) going around the faculty that she uses tears as threat. She will literally cry if you do not obey her instructions. What the fuck woman? Are you even a fucking LECTURER because that shit is unprofessional as fuck. Anddd since she is a communications lecturer I have to put up with her for FOUR consecutive semesters. Thats TWO whole years right there out of my THREE years. FUCK. But what she did that really got to me was how we are all required to buy her RM95 book. But there's a catch. Because she's fucking insane, remember? No good ever comes from a crazy bitch.The first catch is that she only ordered 80 books for the 120 students in our class. The second catch - EVERYONE is required to have the book. Third catch - OR ELSE all you bookless people sit in a corner while she teaches those with books. Fourth catch - NO PHOTOCOPIES.
Well, she is on a whole new level of crazy. FUCKING CATSHIT CRAZY BITCH OF A WOMAN. And this is just one little part of her personality you're seeing, its not even the full picture yet. This is why I kiss her ass whenever possible. Because you absolutely cannot reason with crazy people.
May the good lord have mercy on my soul.
Sunday, January 25, 2015
I Don't Know About You, But I'm Not Feeling 22
Oh. Oh no. I'm 22 today. I cannot believe it. Where did the time go? I don't want to grow old. Seems like I was just 21 yesterday.
Well I was literally 21 yesterday anyway hahahh. And I also did literally nothing at home. I didn't get crazy drunk in a club, nor did I go smoking weed / vape / whatever all these young people are smoking like wtf am I even a young person ??? I fear the day I reach 25 and the quarter life crisis hits me, but one thing for sure I hope I make it back to the States to celebrate my birthday there. Honestly, I am jealous of my other friends who are out there in the world experiencing life. I want to do that too... while I'm still young and full of enthusiasm. With every passing day in uni I get more and more life sucked out of me oh god. Thinking about going back to uni and seeing my classmates make me wanna die.
On the bright side: I probably could make it back to the States before I'm 25. Yeh that's a good thought.
I also have great friends and family members, I am so thankful for all the supportive people around me. They're the real mvps in keeping me sane.
Thursday, January 1, 2015
2015 Resolutions
I really have to make this list so that I can get back to studying for my finals which is coming up in 3 days. Okay, first things first (I'm the realest):
• study harder and maintain my Dean's list!!!
My grades have been slipping and my body and mind is constantly debating whether to study or sleep, and I choose the latter EVERY DAMN TIME. My finals is creeping up real quick and I haven't done shit. And I'm starting to regret not studying but here I am, not even moving.
• do my squats
I want a Beyonce booty but I don't have the motivation Beyonce has. Blah. I should probably focus on getting back my stamina first.
• be a better driver
Well right now my driving is pretty steady considering I drive manual transmission and not auto. Somebody please warn my grandparents I'm gonna take them on a road trip again when I get back. And it's time to whine at my mother to let me drive her car.
• blog more
I had so much to blog about during last year's CNY but guess what? Yeh. I didn't write a single thing about the road trip with my grandparents, and about how my grandpa took a bullet to his calf, and about how my grandma was adopted as a maid at the age of 8 because her parents died during the war.
• better a better human in general
Ok I really don't know what else to list as my resolution so I'm just gonna put this here in case I think of something that I want done by the end of this year and regret not putting it on the list. Like playing the guitar more often because I did not even touch my guitar last year. And I just realised I cannot think on demand so yeh I probably need a new brain.
Right. I cannot believe I have been doing this resolution thing for so long. I don't even remember I have a resolution list until the end of the year (31st December precisely). Does anyone else feel like time passes by really quickly too? Literally this time last year I was wishing for a better year ahead, and although it was significantly better I don't remember much.
Here's to a more memorable year ahead, as a 22-year-old.
Wednesday, December 31, 2014
New Year's Resolution 2014
I've been doing this resolution thing for so long it's not right if I don't keep up with this tradition. To recap; I don't really remember much about this year. It's like it just whooshed past me and I'm 21 it's supposed to be exciting I should be clubbing and doing exciting things but here I am, wasting another year. I didn't get a key pendant for my birthday. Literally nothing exciting happened. I didn't get smashed. I didn't get a cake (I think? I forgot). Well... Let's see how many things I can cross off my list.
• get a gpa of 3.7 and above for all my semesters
Yes. My first semester was really impressive but come second semester, it went downhill. I can predict my future semesters will be worse. It's not that I didn't study, but when you have stingy ass lecturers that give you shitty marks for assignment, no amount of Our Fathers and Hail Mary's can save your burnt ass. So I guess I can cross this off my list.
• exercise
If you challenge me to a 100m sprint right now, I'll die on the 10m mark. I bought a school gym membership back in March and I actually exercised 3 times a week (to my disbelief) but not anymore. I tried walking home a few weeks ago and while I made it home, my body was ready to die. I even tried squats for a nice firm booty but it didn't happen.
• get another piercing
Nope. No new piercings, despite how much I really want one.
• learn to forgive and forget
Ah this. I'm more forgiving now, but don't trust me not to talk shit about you. Sometimes I try to forget but my brain refuses to delete any unwanted files. However when I really want to remember something, my brain decides to forget. But I realised something - we can never remember what we have forgotten.
• spend more time with my grandparents
Apart from school keeping me busy, when I was back I did spend time with them. I drove them to Ipoh and that remained to be my biggest achievement of 2014. My grandparents are the only people willing to entrust their life to me to drive them anywhere. Wow. Even my own mother doesn't give me that kinda trust level. And my manual driving skills have definitely improved a lot. I think I can drive by myself on the road now but I should probably come with a warning.
Goodbye 2014. You were really forgettable.
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
Where Did All My Time Go?
I can't believe it's the 1st of Halloween already. I still remember keying in my July entry in the discomfort of my dorm room and here I am again, in a completely different room doing the same thing. I wanted to update my blog during my two long months at home but I did not because the two months weren't so long after all. I didn't get a job, and all I did was hibernate the whole time. I wish I had gone back to the hotel I worked at a year ago but I did not because thinking about the work stress completely turned me off. I cannot handle another phone call asking me if this is Vivo Hotel right after I said "good morning, Vivo Hotel". I cannot handle being chewed out for checking in a family of 8 into a 10ft×8ft standard room made for 2 when the person checking in lied to me. I cannot handle the manager yelling at me for people not checking out after 12pm. BECAUSE I DONT GET PAID ENOUGH TO DO THIS SHIT. Well yeh it's a pretty shitty job but at least some of the guests are nice enough to remember my name, and one even tipped me.
So, what exactly did I do for 2 months? I did things so insignificant I don't even remember anymore. But it was great spending time at home just relaxing and sometimes walking to the mall to get McD.
Over here, life has been really good since I moved out of college. I no longer have to deal with obnoxious housemates that sabotaged me (this is a story saved for some other time) and no longer have to feel so depressed and lonely all the time. Back in college I barely spoke more than 50 words in the first semester with my roommate, and I mean it. I am so glad I took a single room because I cannot deal with living with strangers. We had absolutely no common grounds and putting me and her together is like putting ducks and chicken together in a coop. But one good thing about her is she minds her own business. That's my favorite type of people.
Now, I'm just waiting for the day when my housemates finally fall out. I'm putting my money on the weird girl that washes her clothes every fucking day with the washing machine subsequently wasting so much water a month on clothes that she could have just easily hand washed. Or maybe it won't be her. Maybe it would be the other health freak girl that gives me a look of disgust every time I eat a pack of instant noodles. Or maybe it would be the guy with an over protective girlfriend that doesn't even let him be in an assignment group full of girls without flipping her shit? Why the fuck is she so crazy? Weird people are everywhere.
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